Poladroid <33

i didn't want to leave my blog on a sad note tonight...

so i had some fun w/ poladroid!!! it's a download that takes your pictures and makes them into polaroid pictures. it's supa cute, you will just have to check it out. here. to do it yourself!

Bon nuit!!

-Cj

Hide.

Some days (most actually) I just want to hide from the entire world.
I just feel so insecure, and all i can think is 'fml'.

photo courtesy of cupcakeYum.

i absolutely detest these days with a passion.

i just finished the book, "the best little girl in the whole world"

its about a 15 year old girl that has anorexia. and it goes into her mind, this obsession with making herself thinner and thinner. she creates games of things she can and cannot do inside and her head. and eventually the obsession becomes so strong that nothing can stop her from losing more and more weight. ultimately, her drive was created by the need for attention and feeling like someone actually cared/noticed. she was the "best little girl", perfect grades, ballerina, nothing to ever dislike or cause any negative attention. so she created this world where she had to be perfect and it slipped out of her control and ended up hurting herself without even realizing it because her mind had become so twisted and obscured and obsessed with her 'games'.
her psychologist helps her to express how she feels, pissed off, mad, unloved. everything that her parents made her feel like, even though they did truly love her, but that fact was SHE didn't feel like they did. she wasn't able to express herself, she sucked it in as if it was her problem. and eventually the pain and anger caused to her to begin the 'games'.

this book was amazing, it opened my eyes to a part of my life that is hard to understand and sometimes hard to put in understandable words.. besides my own feelings. i could help, but when i got to the end.

i could go waaay more in depth about this book and continue to relate it to a million things, but its been a few days since i finished it... and i think i would be better if you just read the book yourself.

well, im gonna run this freaking bad day away. all though, i doubt today it will make me feel anybetter. :(

-Cj

Coloring.

Lately, I have started to COLOR again. It is really fun! I prefer to color hello kitty. She is just soo damn cute. :]

Sometimes getting old is super frustrating. Like why can't I spend my time doing silly pointless things like coloring. Oh, i long for old days, where life was simple and carefree.

So for now, I will just pretend I am young and color...with some style!

Seriously, go find a coloring book and use EVERYTHING you own crayons, markers, pencils, paint...heck even nail polish. whatever! and fill in those dull, boring, white spaces.

(and mb even go outside the lines...)

yes, i live dangerously.

peace.-CJ

Flooood. :(

my hometown is flooding right now. its a scary disaster.

this picture is one bridge, connecting fargo and moorhead. :( and this was from yesterday and the river is still going higher.

NY times.

^there today's article.

all this happened so quickly. it will be a intense next few days. luckily my house should be safe, but many many people have had to evacuate and are probably going to lose their homes or suffer damage.

isn't it weird when disaster hits so close to home? its always 'not you' and when it is your like whoa. I may not be at home right now, but it still weird. it makes you feel so helpless and small. something like water can become so powerful and destroy some part of your life. It is not a very happy thought.

hopefully, the dike will hold and the river doesn't go higher then 43 ft.

:/-Cj

Letting Go.

There is one thing in this world that I miss more than anything.

And that dance or figure skating. both actually.

When I dance, it gives me this amazing high that cannot be achieved elsewhere. Anyone who dances knows what feeling I am talking about. It is the one thing in this world that makes me happy and lets me be on top of the world for just a moment.

My favorite kind of dance is more "modern" you could say, like Isadora Duncan. Its kind of like figure skating on land. Before I danced, I was a figure skater so that is likely where I get this figure skater/dance. The type of dance I enjoy was inspired by Isadora Duncan, a modern dancer. The style if graceful, like a bird and 'freeing'. To me dance is an expression of passion and emotion. I want to fully embrace the freedom of expressing this wonderful feeling by letting go of all of life's problems and worries. I just think dance is beautiful and is one small part of this world I can deeply enjoy and use to express myself in a different way. Especially because some things just cannot be expressed in words.

I haven't been able to dance for some time...and I have only figured skated once since eighth grade. :( I miss both dearly. For now I run...some days running gives me the feeling of flying and on those days I love running as much I do dance.

So now, Im off..... to RuN!



-Cj

Show your Heart. <3

With as much creativity as you can muster, show your heart in:

1 picture, 1 poem, 1 song or piece of music, 1 phrase or quote, 1 item of clothing, 1 place

[And just for fun-] 1 Disney princess!

1 picture.



1 poem.

If you think you are beaten.
by Walter D. Wintle

If you think you are beaten, you are.
If you think you dare not, you don't.
If you'd like to win but think you can't, It's almost certain you won't.
Life's battles don't always go To the stronger or faster man,
But sooner or later, the man who wins
Is the man who thinks he can.


1 song.

chasing pavements- adele. listen/watch here.

1 phrase/quote.

the way to know life is to love many things. -vincent van gogh.

1 item of clothing.


1 place.


1 Disney princess. :]



yay! im finaally done.

-Cj

BoA!

BoA is from South Korea. I absolutely love her sound. She has a eclectic sound plus she is from Korea! Her new Cd was just released on the 17th, and it is her first English debut.

She is much more unique sounding then a typical American and will definitely make it on my iPod.

Click here to listen to her new single I Did It for Love.

-Cj

Obsession!

Whoo!! ....

What is your current obsession?
Coloring Hello Kitty.

Which item from your closet are you wearing most lately?
My gray converse shoes.

What’s for dinner?
frozen vegetables!! w/ pasta sauce

What was the last thing you bought?
..vitamin e oil

What are you listening to right now?
A DAY TO REMEMBER- homesick (new cd)

Say something to the person who tagged you:
You should give me blogging tips! haha

Favorite vacation spot?
that I've been to...Oregon. but I'd rather vacation in London.

What are you reading right now?
Kate Moss: Model of Imperfection

What four words would you use to describe yourself?
ridiculous, classy, obsessive, artistic

What is your current guilty pleasure?
cupcaaaaaaaaaakes. :]

What will be the first spring thing you do?
walk to Dairy Queen!

Where are you planning to travel next?
Minneapolis!

What was the last thing you watched?
my accounting professor talk.

That was fun!!

London in spring! I have sprring fever like mad. It is actually nice here in Minnesota.

btw...HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY!

Hope your day is as nice as mine.

:]-Cj

Quick Quote.....

"I must learn to love the fool in me--the one who feels too much, talks too much, takes too many chances, wins sometimes and loses often, lacks self-control, loves and hates, hurts and gets hurt, promises and breaks promises, laughs and cries. It alone protects me against that utterly self-controlled, masterful tyrant whom I also harbor and who would rob me of human aliveness, humility, and dignity but for my fool." -- Theodore I. Rubin, MD

I stole this from Cup of Jo's blog.

I find this quote personally very true.

<3- Cj

A Piece of Cake.

Recently, I just finished one of the most wonderful amazing books ever. Seriously, if you need encouragement or hope. You should definitely READ THIS BOOK. I give it *****five stars. (out of five)


WARNING! A majority of the book is about prostitution, drugs, and gangs,etc. If you can not handle it, i suggest you don't read it. This part is a large portion of the book, but it gets good at the end.

Well, I don't want to give away the whole book, but Here is Cupcake's Site.

Basically, it is book's like these that make me know without a doubt that I really can do anything.

So never say never and don't let anything stop you. and Read this book!!


Ciao! It's sprrrrrrrrrrrrrrrring break. :] - Cj

Higher Power?

A question I have been pondering about lately is the idea of God.

I have come to the point in my life where I need to make a decision on what my personal philosophy is and what I truly believe.



I grew in a very strict evangelical home. I do not want to believe anything because that is what I have been told my whole life. Just because this is what I have always been told doesn't make it real/true. I mean think about it everyone grew up being told something was true.

So lately, I have been thinking maybe there is some higher power. Something bigger and stronger, and all "He" wants is for us to listen to him and depend on him. In all reality, we can't do everything on our own.

Maybe this is all a bit hazy and relative. But I got to believe there is something above and everyone else just has their own ideas how he came about.

Who knows. I am probably wrong.

-Cj

Ultimate Cure?

I have this obsession with vitamins because they are so important of daily functions. And I am fascinated with how each one contributes to the body and how. I believe that the food we find ourselves usually eating, don't hold the proper nutrients to keep a person physically and mentally strong. The main reason I found myself so interested in vitamins was to help cure/end my struggle with acne. There hasn't been much scientific evidence that it works, so it really depends on your own person regimen and it will effect everyone differently. First off, being a college student who is limited to only two meals a day, it can be hard to eat balanced meal that fulfill all the needed nutrients.

As of now I am taking:

1. Fish Oil- This helps keep inflammation down. They also have omega-3, which a lot of people are lacking! But fish oil have a million benefits, and you can read about all the details yourself. HERE.
   
2. Probiotics- This keeps your colon clean and replenishes the 'good' bacteria. You might want to take these if you are on any antibiotics especially long term. I have been on numerous antibiotics for many years so I started this to rebuild there effectiveness. Even if you aren't on antibiotics they are good to take because when their is food stuck in the colon it can cause inflammation or break outs. (recently: i stopped the antibiotics and am now doing it the natural way)
3. Multi-vitamin- There are a million different types out there. Personally, I look at the back and compare the dosages of each vitamin. It is really personal preference, but basically they all have they should have all the same vitamins. I strongly suggest a mult-vitamin because it has lots of b-vitmains which are important, but kinda hard to take just by themself. You don't NOT want to overdose on certain vitmains like vitamin A so do your research if you plan on experimenting and taking multiple vitamins at one time. I also like multi-vitmains because then you know you are getting everything you need for the day.
4. Biotin- This is actually in multi-vitamins, but it is really important for skin,nails, and hair. So I take an extra supplement of it too. I have noticed a big difference in my nails, they seem to grow faster and are much whiter, stronger. I have pretty long hair already, but I assume if my nails are growing so is my hair.
   
5. Garlic Pills- These help with the inflammation, but they aren't too important and don't take them all the time. I decided to take these pills after eating a large clove of garlic and my face seemed to be a lot brighter and less red. Its hard to measure if they really work or not?
   

I think vitamins can possibly cure mental disorders. Personally, I think it is pretty easy to miss out on a lot of required daily vitamins. A lot of vitamins are needed to keep your mental health in order...maybe this has to do with why there are so many mental disorders today?

Think about it: Eating high fat foods like cookies and chips have little nutritional value. Eating this food not only makes you fat, but you are depriving yourself from real nutrition. You become overweight and unable to think clearly and function really as you should be. This viscious cycle of eating more junk and never getting 'better'. If both of those things happened to me, I would be depressed or wish I had some mental disorder to blame it all on.

Maybe vitamins are not the cure for every problem. But you can focus on how it may help on how they can give added benefits and possibly increase your general well-being. I see it as just one easy way towards taking control of your life.

Simply Blog.

I'm evaluating a multi-media course on blogging from the folks at Simpleology. For a while, they're letting you snag it for free if you post about it on your blog.

It covers:

• The best blogging techniques.
• How to get traffic to your blog.
• How to turn your blog into money.

I'll let you know what I think once I've had a chance to check it out. Meanwhile, go grab yours while it's still free.

im testing this out...hopefully its got some good stuff. :)

So What is my Point??

I decided you may be wondering...so what is the point of this blog you may ask?


Well when I was working on ideas, I thought about what I would want to read.

I ended up naming it Create. Reality
So...I suppose the point is to create your dreams and make them into reality.

I have this problem of sitting on my ass and dreaming all day long. Where can life go if you just dream all day long?

Think about it...The days may seem short, but how often is time wasted and thrown away?

You got to snag the time there is...especially because you never know when your time is up.

only You can make your dreams a reality.~Cj

wanna get lost?

this is what i'm thinking.....

somedays I just want to get away. i don't really care where i go or what i do.
even if i 'get lost' on purpose. its still an adventure.

lets go!!


Chelsea J :]